The last time I worked in a big office was in the early 90s. Gazza was bawling his eyes out and the internet hadn't been thought of. It was all faxes and post then. I think mobile phones were just getting off the ground, but only just off the ground because they were as heavy as a log.
Even though that was half my life ago, I still remember that time like it was yesterday. I can't remember the work very well, but I remember the laughs. I remember going out to the pub for lunch all the time, and I remember being off my bonce on whisky at the Christmas party because there was no other booze left, and I'm told while I was out of it I won a competition for moving an elastic band from my forehead to my neck without touching it, just by wiggling my face, but that part I don't remember.
I remember getting absolutely bollocked for bouncing hundreds of direct debits that I wasn't supposed to, and I remember having trouble getting to work because of the snow, and I remember being late in and having to take it out of our lunch breaks. And I remember arguments about parking charges and I remember being in a very minor car crash with Alison Rhodes and I remember her falling on her arse in her wellies on the ice, and it was funny even though her bum really hurt. And I remember Andrew Spink being annoyed that Leeds had sold Vinnie Jones, and I remember the two of them dressed up for Yorkshire Day (Alison and Andrew, not Andrew and Vinnie Jones).
And I remember Mandy Mason dressed as Andy Pandy and I remember her going on maternity leave to have her daughter who is now all grown up. And I remember Anne Smith and her stories of horrible car crashes and the worst broken arm anyone had ever seen.
And I remember that the manager's office doorframe was coming away from the wall, because of all the times it got slammed behind one of us, when we'd got absolutely hammered for making a mistake, and I remember the long walks across the office we had to do when our badge card numbers got read out. And I remember how they used to draw the blinds before they used to shout at you. And I remember Liz Thompson always wore trainers and she was always chasing and tackling things in them, or so she said.
And I remember that they brought Total Quality Management or TQM in, and part of it was that there was supposed to be a no-blame culture, but I still remember getting the blame for a lot of stuff.
And I remember Angela Richardson used to hang around for hours out the back looking through boxes and I remember that we used to make each other giggle, just by saying the word 'smashed'.
But the thing I remember the most is the laughing.
Anyway, since then I haven't worked in a big office, with lots of people. It's all been small offices with only a few. Until the last 4 months.
I'm 20 years older now but it's been like going round again. Working with a new bunch of young people, all in their twenties or younger. They've all got smart phones now, and they're all on Twitter, and they like to Facetime each other, and music's all gone digital and now there's more different colours of drink to get hammered on. And nobody uses faxes anymore.
But some things have stayed the same. Sometimes you still get called into meetings to get bollocked, and sometimes you even get called into meetings to get fired.
But the thing I'll remember the most has been the laughter. And if I can still remember the people I was laughing with in the early 90s now, I'm sure in twenty years time I'll remember the class of 2012 just as well.
I may forget what a PFF2 is, and I might forget that it goes 'cover letter, then financial' (although I doubt it) but I'm sure I won't forget the people. I didn't forget the ones I went to Germany with in 1983, I didn't forget the ones I worked with in 1990, and I won't forget Gibbo and Rob and Vicky and Footy and Rookesy and Deano and Joss and Lucy and Sophie and Cozza and Kirstywho'snotaGeordie and Steve and Phil and Edd and Rebecca and all the rest.
Because whatever differences we may have had, whether we were older or younger, or came from different places, or had different backgrounds, or had different life experiences, we all had one thing in common.
We all knew how to laugh at stuff.
Even though that was half my life ago, I still remember that time like it was yesterday. I can't remember the work very well, but I remember the laughs. I remember going out to the pub for lunch all the time, and I remember being off my bonce on whisky at the Christmas party because there was no other booze left, and I'm told while I was out of it I won a competition for moving an elastic band from my forehead to my neck without touching it, just by wiggling my face, but that part I don't remember.
I remember getting absolutely bollocked for bouncing hundreds of direct debits that I wasn't supposed to, and I remember having trouble getting to work because of the snow, and I remember being late in and having to take it out of our lunch breaks. And I remember arguments about parking charges and I remember being in a very minor car crash with Alison Rhodes and I remember her falling on her arse in her wellies on the ice, and it was funny even though her bum really hurt. And I remember Andrew Spink being annoyed that Leeds had sold Vinnie Jones, and I remember the two of them dressed up for Yorkshire Day (Alison and Andrew, not Andrew and Vinnie Jones).
And I remember Mandy Mason dressed as Andy Pandy and I remember her going on maternity leave to have her daughter who is now all grown up. And I remember Anne Smith and her stories of horrible car crashes and the worst broken arm anyone had ever seen.
And I remember that the manager's office doorframe was coming away from the wall, because of all the times it got slammed behind one of us, when we'd got absolutely hammered for making a mistake, and I remember the long walks across the office we had to do when our badge card numbers got read out. And I remember how they used to draw the blinds before they used to shout at you. And I remember Liz Thompson always wore trainers and she was always chasing and tackling things in them, or so she said.
And I remember that they brought Total Quality Management or TQM in, and part of it was that there was supposed to be a no-blame culture, but I still remember getting the blame for a lot of stuff.
And I remember Angela Richardson used to hang around for hours out the back looking through boxes and I remember that we used to make each other giggle, just by saying the word 'smashed'.
But the thing I remember the most is the laughing.
Anyway, since then I haven't worked in a big office, with lots of people. It's all been small offices with only a few. Until the last 4 months.
I'm 20 years older now but it's been like going round again. Working with a new bunch of young people, all in their twenties or younger. They've all got smart phones now, and they're all on Twitter, and they like to Facetime each other, and music's all gone digital and now there's more different colours of drink to get hammered on. And nobody uses faxes anymore.
But some things have stayed the same. Sometimes you still get called into meetings to get bollocked, and sometimes you even get called into meetings to get fired.
But the thing I'll remember the most has been the laughter. And if I can still remember the people I was laughing with in the early 90s now, I'm sure in twenty years time I'll remember the class of 2012 just as well.
I may forget what a PFF2 is, and I might forget that it goes 'cover letter, then financial' (although I doubt it) but I'm sure I won't forget the people. I didn't forget the ones I went to Germany with in 1983, I didn't forget the ones I worked with in 1990, and I won't forget Gibbo and Rob and Vicky and Footy and Rookesy and Deano and Joss and Lucy and Sophie and Cozza and Kirstywho'snotaGeordie and Steve and Phil and Edd and Rebecca and all the rest.
Because whatever differences we may have had, whether we were older or younger, or came from different places, or had different backgrounds, or had different life experiences, we all had one thing in common.
We all knew how to laugh at stuff.
No comments:
Post a Comment